Hey guys, this will be a really long post.. so if u guys are really not into reading stuff which is long and boring.. then there's a summary at the end of the whole thing.. Here it goes...

It really ticks it's time away, a rather silly clock.. but it has to be that way isnt it? there aint ani other way to make it work, then again, even if there's a possibility to make it stop, it's not like the earth has stop revolving around the sun rite? Aug 9? i have been on a piece of foreign land fer 8 months, not that i regretted it.. but it aint that much of an experience.. Friends i made, yet those who i cld bear my heart out, i found none.. I miss the people who i really care for.. you know who u guys are rite? and of cos that special someone, but i hate to say who.. cos it mks everything looks rather normal.. aint it so?

I tried so hard to read law and love it, yet it just isnt that simple as i thought, and not as wonderful as i thought it wld be.. 2 days frm now and i shall be sitting in front of a table and making sure i know what the teachers have been talking since the start of the year.. they dun make sense, but i have to make sense out of the rubbish that they said..

GOD.. i have failed him so many times, and yet everytime he forced me to stand up and move nearer towards him, i have fulfilled my promise to him, yet it is now time to fulfil another promise of mine towards him.. I know he will lead me, but how far, Lord, i am scared when i wandered out of ur sight.. i am afraid when things are not in control, i am afraid when u are no longer angry wif me, i am afraid when i become just another creation of urs... yet i am most afraid when i could no longer love you, no matter hw much you would love me, becos of my shame, becos of my desire in worldly ideas rather than submit to your greater plan...

Back to singapore soon, i din realise that time flew by.. i din noe that hardworking has never appeared in my dictionary, i din noe that i am not smart, i din noe that i got pple falling for me when all i did was to chat, i din noe that words are venom, i din noe that i could not do enough, i din noe that if i wake up dead tomorrow, no one will remember me, i din noe that i could try harder, and most importantly, i din noe that there are so many that love me for who i am, embracing my faults juz like how they embraced my smile.. I hate flying, it has become a part of me soon, when flying wld be the only thing that i would look forward to.. i hate departures, and i love arrivals.. i love the day when my brother is back from new zealand, i like the way we chatted about juz anithing and everything..

I noe that my family is impt, i noe that mi studies is priority, i noe that U are precious, and i noe that my frens are nice, what i do not know is what i know enough? i duno..

There is this time when i had a dream, i dreamt of the beautiful things in life, the smiles, the laughter, the irritating sounds that my frens make which i oways tot was music.. then i woke up, back to this cold reality, i tried to fall aslp again, but before i know, i was awaken by the stupid clock, signalling to me that it's time to pack my bag and leave for school.. I remembered that morning was cold, cos it rained so heavily the nite before, and i remembered the times when i enjoyed school, cos THEY were there..

Then things became abit harsh, reality became cruel.. and the rest.. it became history.. I don't want to be someone powerful, special.. i juz wan to be someone that another someone will probably remember and smile when that someone thinks of me..

I just wan to be someone that My O.I remembers me when im away..

I just wan to be someone that my family will be proud of..

I just wan to be someone that takes my matters seriously..

I just wan to be someone that can enjoy love..

I just wan to be someone that can enjoy god's affection..

I just wan to be someone that can stand up after falling..

I just wan to be Myself....

I shut it....

Summary:

This is my life, and if you cant even be bothered abt reading then why care?